The Juicy Middle Part

Every story has a beginning, a middle and the end. My first blog post was the beginning, how I got into yachting. If you read it you will know that I pretty much packed up my entire life in the space of a week and travelled across the globe to work temporarily on board a superyacht with my boyfriend. However, it wasn't all rainbows and daisies and it certainly wasn't as easy as simply getting on board, making the crew fall in love with me as they turned my temporary contract to a permanent one. Although I'd be lying if I didn't say I hoped for it at the time. No, no, this was just the beginning of my journey. This post is the juicy middle bit.

Now there's a couple of things you need to know about the yachting industry. Firstly, how unpredictable it is. Secondly, how superficial it is and thirdly, how unbelievably fast pace it is. Basically, when you decide to join the industry the best hopes of you getting a job is by moving to Antibes in that sweet spot between end of March and the beginning of April, staying in a crew house, dock walking (physically going to boats in the port and handing them your CV), visiting crew agents and scrolling through the hundreds of Facebook groups looking for job posts.

People say that it generally takes 2-4 weeks to find a job as long as you're proactive and you do everything I mentioned above. No. Not true. Finding a job is different for everyone. I was living with people who had to give up and go home because they had been searching for so long, had run out of money and could only afford a plane ticket home. Some people didn't even unpack, they arrived one day, got a job and were out of there the next. What I'm saying is, it's all very circumstantial. I was in the crew house for about three weeks before I found a job. Let me tell you, those were the longest three weeks ever. When you have absolutely no idea when or if you are going to find a job and you are doing absolutely everything you can to find something, it is scary. Each day goes by and you're looking at your bank balance rapidly decline and you wonder when will be the day to give up and go home. But then thankfully I was one of the lucky ones who got to sneak outside during the evening film to answer that life changing call. "We would like to employ you, when can you move on board?" I was over the moon.

Now if you've made it this far, well done you but I'm not nearly finished yet. Moving on board and unpacking in my new cabin was amazing, I felt untouchable. "Here I am, and I've made it. Now I can relax and settle in to this life of yachting" were some of the thoughts running through my head. I was just so happy to find something that felt a little bit more permanent. If you're anything like me, you understand the feeling of wanting stability and after three months of having absolutely no idea how I was going to get by in a foreign country without a job, I finally felt at peace. That was until things took a turn. I was working harder than I ever had before, my stamina not quite matching the other girls as I was definitely not used to these long hours. I was living with strangers, just trying my best to fit in and get a feel for things. But I knew it and they knew it; I was just a puzzle piece that did not fit. The only thing that crossed my mind was to give it time. Everything was new and I was just getting used to it. Everything will work itself in the end. And it did, just not in the way I expected it to.

I was doing my normal duties downstairs in the crew area when the captain said very casually over his morning coffee 'Emily, we're going to have to let you go.' The sentence that no one ever wants to hear. It felt like the world stopped. I couldn't see anything or hear anything after that. All I could think was "What now?" After a couple of teary phone calls, I went into action mode. Somehow I managed to walk myself into the Captain's office with the last bit of dignity I had left to ask for the day off to get my ducks in a row.

Being fired is honestly the most humbling experience I have ever been through and looking back I am so glad it happened the way it did. The only reason I was asked to leave was because I didn't fit in, nothing personal and nothing to do with my work. That boat was just not my boat. Nonetheless, as I was walking around to all the crew agents I just felt so stupid for having that sense of stability, it was such a false sense of security. Who did I think I was? I wasn't untouchable, I was very replaceable. That is what got me down the most. The fact that I thought I was better than that. Being fired never even crossed my mind. But here I was back to square one. Unemployed, in France with no plan.

That same day, as I was walking back to the boat to pack up my things (I had the option to stay on board for another week but I couldn't bare it) I got a phone call. A boat in Italy needed some help preparing the interior for their launch. It was another temporary gig and it was going to be far away from James but for some reason I felt obligated to take it. The pay was good and they were going to pay for my travel and living expenses. Why not?

So after a short break to see some sunflower fields in Valensole with James (He happened to have a few days off work as well so the timing worked out perfectly), off I went to Italy. Still not knowing what the future had in store for me and still recovering from the metal challenges of being fired. I didn't let that stop me from having the most wonderful time in Italy. Working 08:00-17:00 instead of 07:00-22:00 was lovely. Eating all the Italian food, walking to work every day with the fellow day workers they had employed. It was blissful. All the while still applying for jobs, taking skype interviews in the hotel and desperately scouring through Facebook. Luckily for the interior day workers they wanted to extend our contract by an extra week and take us all from Livorno to Sardinia. I mean, of course we all jumped at the opportunity. A couple of days after we arrived in Sardinia both of my 'colleagues' had been offered permanent jobs on other boats. And here I was still waiting for at least one reply from the hundreds of emails I had been sending out, recovering from the worst stomach bug I have ever had in my life with this awful red rash on my face (probably from all the stress) and just feeling very, very sorry for myself. Nothing was working out.

The day before we flew out of Sardinia James sends me a message 'Do you want a job?' I thought, 'Obviously I want a job. What are you on about?' In a bittersweet twist, one of the girls on board James's boat was leaving and the Captain wanted to offer me her position. She was (and still is) a good friend of mine so I was over the moon about finally getting my stable, permanent position but sad she wouldn't be there. And so, I had come full circle.

This emotional rollercoaster of a year seemed so impossible when I was hitting obstacle after obstacle but looking back I can see that every obstacle and everything I had to overcome was necessary to get me to where I am today- not just in my career but also personally. If the job on that first boat had worked out, I wouldn't have been offered a job to work with James. If the job in Italy didn't come up on the same day I got fired, I might have given up and gone home. Even the fact that James managed to get three consecutive days off (which, if you knew our boat, just never happens) in the week I needed him most, it's just incredible. Everything worked out perfectly.

I guess, the point of this post is to just encourage you. You may be struggling with something that seems impossible, with an ugly red rash on your face and a stomach bug that feels like you should probably be hospitalised for but you are exactly where you need to be right now. Sometimes we need to be at our absolute lowest to really appreciate the good stuff. It's when you're at your lowest that you learn about so much about yourself and you can start to grow. So as hard as it is, enjoy the journey. It's the juicy middle part of your story, and that's always the most interesting part.